When Wired Means Tired

I thought this post from Val, author of Chronicles of a Babywise Mom, is a great post.  It talks about how a tired child doesn't act like a tired adult.  I don't know how many times I've heard "They don't seem tired at all"!  And you know they HAVE to be tired as it was either a busy day, a day full of activities, they had a short nap,etc.  But they don't act like it.  They act like Energizer  Bunnies that keep "going and going and going".  BUT that is the issue.  They are actually wired and that is a sign of overtired.  I have seen that in my kids too.  They don't "seem" tired but in fact they are running on pure adrenaline and desperately need sleep.  The fallacy is many parents assume this is "normal" and how kids act and they accept this as the norm.  But the reality is the children need a lot more sleep and if they are well-rested they won't be in this "hyper" state.  Sure kids can be active and there are some with different personalities and temperaments. But there is a difference between active and wired.  So keep this post in mind when your child becomes giddy or slap happy.  Often that is a warning  bell that they need to go to bed pronto!
-------------------------------------------------------------
Here is the post from Val's blog:

In many ways, babies and children are miniature adults. It is not true, however, in all areas of life, and definitely not true when it comes to showing signs of sleepiness.

Think of yourself when you are tired. You yawn. Your eyelids droop. If you are like my husband you just fall asleep and start the head bob. You feel lethargic and unmotivated.

A great paradox of parenting is that a baby or young child does not do these things. In Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child, Dr. Weissbluth states, "...when most tired young kids get sleepy, they get grumpy and excitable" page 111. He points out that well-rested children children might yawn when tired, but chronically tired children will not. His son called the state of tiredness "upcited" when he was three--a combination of upset and excited. Perfect right?

Dr. Weissbluth says, "Remember, when your infant or young child appears wired, he may be tired" (page 112). 

Dr. Weissbluth then goes on to discuss a couple of studies that shed light on this topic. I will relate one to you in my own way. You know those times in life when you have had to run on less sleep than is optimal? Maybe college, maybe with a newborn, maybe when pregnant (if you are like me and don't sleep well at night). Have you noticed how you eventually get used to running on less sleep? It doesn't mean you are functioning at 100%, but you learn to function.

I find this true in my life. When I have a newborn and consistently get less sleep than is ideal, my body copes. When I have one bad night of sleep for whatever reason, I am slammed the next day. 

The study found that the body responds to lack of sleep with various chemicals. One is adrenaline. Another is cortisol. "In children, cortisol concentrations remain high when they do not nap" (page113). 

This increase in chemicals explains why an overly tired child has a hard time falling and/or staying asleep. The body is flooded with chemicals in order to help the overly tired child stay awake, so it makes it harder to sleep. Just as sleep begets sleep, sleeplessness begets sleeplessness. 

Conclusion

A tired child does not look like a tired adult. You can't wait around for your baby to ask you to put him to sleep or to peacefully drift off into a slumber. Yes, some of those children are out there, but most need you to put them to bed for naps and for bedtime. 

Also, let me give another plug for this book. It is a most excellent companion to On Becoming Babywise. People who try to discredit Babywise like to turn to "Gary Ezzo isn't a doctor"  when all else is failing (despite the fact that Robert Bucknam is a doctor). There are several books written by doctors that support Ezzos claim that sleep is important and support his ideas on how to get there (do we really need a doctor to convince us that sleep is important? Can't we tell that from our own lives? Or maybe only well-rested adults can come to that conclusion on their own?).

Cumulative Sleepiness

This is a great post on Dr. Weissbluth's blog (as you know one of my favorite sleep experts and author of Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child).  It talks about how a child can slowly build up a sleep debt over time until it comes to a head.  The solution is often, you guessed it, an early bedtime!  It seems like this is something a parent can often turn to time and time again.

Here is the post:
CUMULATIVE SLEEPINESS occurs when your child is a little short on sleep day in and day out. Small amounts of sleep loss add up and the effects of sleep deficiency or sleep deprivation increase. In the beginning, if the daily sleep debt is small, the adverse effects might be minimal at first but they grow and grow as the debt increases. Sometimes, an event such as an illness or three day week-end of messed up sleep throws the child over the edge and ”all of a sudden” sleep issues surface. Bedtime battles, night awakenings, early morning wake ups, or deterioration of naps develop. Often, these sleep issues start out as mild problems but they predictably grow into major sleep issues due to the accumulation of an ever increasing sleep debt. This is the explanation why parents are puzzled by their previously good sleepers suddenly going south.
There are some predictable patterns to recognize:
1. The bedtime is a little too late around 6-9 months of age when the third nap disappears, 12-21 months when the morning nap disappears, between 3-4 years when the single nap disappears.
2. The bedtime is a little too late during the summer time when the days are longer and you want to be outdoors in the evening.
3. Family vacations when naps are skipped or the bedtime is too late.