As mentioned in other posts, I read The Babywhisperer Books by Tracy Hogg and found some of the information really useful. Of course there is lots I don't agree with, but that is like any book, except maybe the Bible:) So, as a parent, it is up to us to take what we think is pertinent and useful to us.
Tracy's first book, Secrets of the Baby Whisperer, tries to teach parents of infants various skills to help them: observing body language, listening to cries, and slowing down so that you can really figure out what is going on.
This post is going to elaborate on the last part slowing down. I think this is a very good suggestion because often time a parent, especially a first-time parent, immediately goes rushing in and swoops up baby at the first cry without first thinking what is the problem, if any. Sometimes there isn't even a real problem! Babies are often "noisy sleepers" as I call them and sometimes they are just transitioning sleep cycles and making sounds in their sleep.....so you could sometimes be actually interfering with them and not really helping (and this is actually from experience with my first child). So Tracy advises slowing down to really figure out what is going on. Tracy has a love of acronyms, to help parents remember the concepts. So she has come up with an acronym, SLOW, explained below:
** Taken from the BabyWhisperer website
S.L.O.W.
Whenever your baby fusses or cries, try this simple strategy, which takes only a few seconds.
Stop. Remember that crying is your baby’s language.
Listen. What does this particular cry mean?
Observe. What is your baby doing? What else is going on?
What’s Up? Based on what you hear and see, evaluate and respond.
S.L.O.W. The word itself is a reminder not to rush in, and each letter helps you remember what to do.
Stop. Stand back and wait a heartbeat; you don’t have to swoop down and pick up your baby the moment she cries. Take three deep breaths to centre yourself and improve your own perception. It will also help you clear your mind of other people’s voices and advice, which often make it hard for you to be objective.
Listen. Crying is your baby’s language. This moment of hesitation is not to suggest that you should let your baby cry. Rather, listen to what he’s saying to you.
Observe. What is his body language telling you? What’s going on in the environment? What was happening right before your baby “said” something?
What’s Up? If you now put it all together—what you’ve heard and seen, as well as where your baby is in the daily routine—you will be able to figure out what she is trying to say to you.
Taken from The secrets of the Baby Whisperer.
For the L in SLOW-listening-involves also paying attention to the broader picture to find clues of meaning. Tracy gives some tips that will help you listen more intently:
Consider the time of day: At what point in the day did your baby start to fuss or cry? Had she just eaten? Had she been up playing? Sleeping? Might her diaper be wet or dirty? Might she be overstimulated? Did your baby do something new, like roll over for the first time or start to crawl?
Consider the context: What else had been happening in the household? Had the dog been barking? Had anyone been using the vacuum or any other loud appliances? Was there a great deal of noise outside? Any of these things may have upset or startled your baby. Was anyone cooking, and if so, were very pungent smells emanating from the kitchen? Was there any other strong-smelling scent in the air like a room freshener? Babies are very sensitive to smells. Also consider the temperature in the room. Was your baby over- or underdressed? If you had baby out of the house longer than usual, was baby subjected to unfamiliar sights, sounds, or smells or to strange people?
Consider yourself: Babies absorb an adult's emotions, particularly their mum's. If you're feeling more anxious or tired or angry than usual, this could affect your baby.
(Taken from Secrets of the Baby Whisperer, pg 70-71)
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